Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Beware of the Beijing!.. This weeks installment comes from a page in my present history or Koran. It all began with an innocent shape up... So I'm on my way to work one day last week and I noticed before I left the house that I wasn't looking so professional, I was scruffy (what we would call in the 90's a "ruffneck") and I stopped in on a local barbershop to get lined up before work real quick; and being that I was in a hurry I hopped in the first available seat and this is when the BS began. To make a long story short, we got through with the shape up, the lady sat me back up in the chair and I felt an abnormal part of the process was taking place. I pushed her hand away from my head and this "brill" had a black pencil in her hand trying draw the god up! Shawty tried to paint on a reinforced/ synthetic. Wait scratch that, I don't know what the f@&k she call herself doing... Beijing! She tried to jing (pronounced 'sching') me! Brill broke a cardinal rule: don't ever do something to a king's face without my knowledge or consent. Plus Ima natty dread i.e. I dread even hitn the barbershop let alone the fact that she tried to alter my crown. I do not care how popular the sh%t get... "Don't. Jing. Me!"
So I say all that to say this, PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT there is a clown ass epidemic going around in our local neighborhood barbershopS. It is called Beijing, and it is not what's happening. Do not drink the koolaid; dont fall a victim to this heinous form of fuckry. Matter fact 10Gs is having a viral contest: if see a clown with this Beijing on; and here are the signs- dudes hair will be extra black like Akon, facial hair will be thin and black appearing as if it was painted on (because it is), ladies you see a brill in your day to day life with extra black eyebrows, she supports the jing... we gotta cut this nonsense off at the root... So if you see someone who these symptoms you have absolute permission to slap the jing off their face. I repeat SLAP THE BEIJING OFF THEIR FACE. Have one of your partners video phone it, give it a cold title like 'hero saves sucker from jing attack' , or 'Beijing smack- it hurts me more than it hurts you', whatever title you give it, submit it to the blog and the best one receives a reward. Seriously people, this epidemic is ruining our community, it takes you to put it to an end. Peace
P.S. And if you have no idea what the Beijing is take a look at exhibit A on the upper left hand corner of this post. His hair says it all... WTF?!